Bisi Adewale, a prominent marriage counselor and cleric, has ignited a national conversation in Nigeria over the growing trend of women traveling abroad for extended periods to provide childcare support, commonly known as omugwo. Speaking during a recent teaching session, Adewale expressed deep concern about the implications of this practice, particularly when elderly husbands are left behind while their wives spend years overseas assisting with newborn care. His remarks have sparked widespread debate on social media and in public forums, touching on sensitive issues of marital unity, family dynamics, and cultural traditions in a rapidly changing society.
Adewale criticized the phenomenon of women leaving for countries like Canada to perform omugwo for up to three years, calling it “very bad” and detrimental to marital stability. He painted a vivid picture of the consequences, stating, “That’s how you’ll see a 75-year-old man going around to buy boli.” His words underscored the emotional and physical toll such prolonged separations can have on aging spouses, especially when they are left to manage daily life alone. The cleric emphasized that marriage is meant to be a partnership, and decisions involving travel for family duties should be made jointly by both partners.
He further stressed that couples should not allow external pressures or family expectations to override their commitment to each other. “If you’re going to Canada, we’re going together,” he declared. “If our child’s house can’t contain us, I have money, I’ll get a hotel.” These statements reflect his belief that financial and logistical challenges should not be used as excuses to break the bond of marriage. Adewale’s stance highlights a growing concern among Nigerian families about how modern migration patterns are reshaping traditional roles and responsibilities within households.
The issue of omugwo, once a local and temporary practice, has evolved into a global phenomenon as more Nigerian women relocate abroad to support their children during childbirth and early infancy. While many see this as a cultural obligation and a way to strengthen family ties, critics like Adewale argue that it often leads to emotional strain, especially in later-life marriages. His comments have prompted discussions on how to balance cultural expectations with the need for marital companionship and mutual support.
As Nigeria continues to grapple with the effects of diaspora migration and evolving family structures, Adewale’s words serve as a reminder of the importance of communication, shared decision-making, and emotional connection in sustaining long-term relationships. His message is likely to resonate with many Nigerians who are navigating the complexities of modern family life in an increasingly globalized world.
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